The Second Coming of Jesus
by Jovitobi
Summary: When there's only one thing elft to do to save the rpecious thing, will Tobi do it and attain lulz on the way?


They were all there for one thing.

Sahk Jr.

And as time wore on, they got restless.

But they had to wait. had to wait for what Tobi thought would be the last chance of survival for the child...

a picture.

An amazing, wonderful, epic picture, that Tobi was trying to quickly scribble. But time ticked away, and Pneji was begging Lee to do the deed and break his promise. He was just about to, but luckily, Tobi finished the picture and was running over to them.

"Here guys, I'm done! After you see this I'm sure you won't possibly think to..." He couldn't finish the sentence, because Tobi, like all of the other Shuers, was watching the expressionless faces of Pneji and Lee as they looked at the wonderfully drawn picture of a rat riding a unicycle, wearing bling and a chastity belt, and eating a phanon-shaped ice cream cone... I mean, who could resist that?

Sadly, Pneji and Lee could.

And Pneji could only moan one sentence in taht state: "Lee... quickly, my feet... hurting..."  
And Lee didn't respond.

Tobi was so happy! He though Lee wasn't going to, and by the looks of it, so did the other Shuers. Khodaa, Shizu... and of course Sahk. She was glowing with happiness, since she thought the same as Tobi... the baby was going to be her namesake, after all, and nothing could make her happier at the moment.

But the happy silence didn't last... because Lee responded to Pneji with one word:  
"FALCOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOONNNNNNNNN..."  
"NO! N... NOT SAHK JR.! LEE Y-YOU CAN'T BE THIS.. THIS C-CRUEL..." Sahk could barely say complete words through her sobbing, and Shizu and Khodaa were on their knees, speechless. And at that moment, only one thing went through Tobi's mind. It wasn't how what he was about to do would affect him, hurt him, possibly kill him... wasn't about the sadness it would bring his friends and family...

it was about saving Sahk Jr. And so he ran.

He ran like he hadn't in Exmortis. And he ran fast enough to make up for it.

He got to his destination right on time, with arms and legs spread out, ready to protect what everybody was there for... and then it came:  
"PUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNNNNNNNNNNNNCHHHHHH!!"

Tobi was numb. He was bunched up somewhere on the floor, like a loli tripping while running from a pedo: scared and helpless. Sahk, Shizu and Khodaa were standing there, shocked, Lee was on the ground, grabbing his arm, and Pneji was behind Tobi, being pushed back when the punch hit Tobi.  
That's right.. a punch... he hadn't realized the power of the punch. By then he was feeling dizzy, and like he was falling... wait, the Shuers were around him? He hadn't noticed.

Khodaa and Shizu were covering their mouthes in horror, and Sahk was shaking him and saying "Say something, Muffin! Speak to me!"

So Tobi did. "I... am... batman."

And then he passed out.

"Where am I...?" He looked around... it looked like he was in a bed, floating in white, white clouds.

He looked around. "Bears?" And bears there were! Some were walking around with needles, others were punching out fire... all in all, it seemed pretty normal to Tobi. But then the bears started fading away... and bit by bit, they became nurses.  
"What kind of nightmare is this? D:" Tobi whispered, perfectly making his face into the D: shape. But it wasn't a nightmare... he pinched himself to make sure of that.

"GET OUT!! I CAN'T HAVE NURSES NEAR ME.. YOU'LL STAEL MY THINGS AND MY HAIRBRUSH AND I'LL HAVE TO BRUSH MY HAIR WITH MY HANDS AND AND AND..."  
"Shhh, Tobitoberkins, you're okay ;;"  
"...Codes? o: Jau"  
"NURSES GTFO." And they listened to her command.  
"Anyways, how are you? Are you feeling alright?"  
"I'm fine... where am I? Where are the others? What happened..."  
"You're in a hospital, Sahk and Lee are in the next room with Pneji and Shizu is trying to get a Good Ending, and you went unconsious after the..."  
"...Falcon Punch." And the events of that night all flooded back.  
"How dare he try to hurt Sahk Jr.! It's not right... it's not fair... I should have Master Spark'd his ass... wait, Sahk Jr! How is she? Is she..."  
"She's perfectly fine and not hurt at all, just like my amount of lives. 83" Finally, Shizu was joining the conversation! But Tobi couldn't blame her for using a distraction... they all needed one after what happened.

"Can I... can I see her?"  
"Of course." And Khodaa helped Tobi into a wheelchair and pushed him off to the next room, Shizu following and bitching at Patchy.

They tried to get into the room, but it was fit to bursting. Khodaa and Shizu tried to push through with the bulky wheelchair, but it was no use. Only one thing could get through that crowd, and Tobi was it.

A loli.

He crawled through their legs, barely pushing his head under their crotches, causing lightning to come out. Many of the Shuers were shocked about this, but the other, more experienced ones knew it was a common happening. Then Tobi stood up and looked at the bed.

Pneji was lying in a bed, Sahk and Lee in chairs beside it. And in Pneji's arms was something that gave Tobi the true feeling of happiness, the feelings of "GOD DAMNIT I ALMOST DIED FOR YOU YOU BETTER BE WORTH IT" pushed aside.

It was a child.

It was Sahk Jr.

It was worth it.

It took a few moments for the mother, the father and the named after to see Tobi.

And when they did, there was only one thing left to say, and it would be said by the thing they were there for again.

"Wewcome Home, Mwuffin."

EVERYTHING WAS DEP FOR THEM FOR EVER AND EVER.

The end


End file.
